The Least, First

Monte Asbury’s blog

Stuff white people like

with 2 comments

Courtesy of Utne Reader, I stumbled upon a pretty funny blog. It appears to be giving advice to non-white people about how to get along with whites, but is really a spoof on white stuff. Here’s a smidge, from a post entitled, “Recycling.” Hop over and enjoy some of the others.

clipped from stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com
Recycling is a part of a larger theme of stuff white people like: saving the earth without having to do that much. Recycling is fantastic! You can still buy all the stuff you like (bottled water, beer, wine, organic iced tea, and cans of all varieties) and then when you’re done you just put it in a DIFFERENT bin than where you would throw your other garbage. And boom! Environment saved! Everyone feels great, it’s so easy!

[If you see a white person with an empty bottle] watch their actions. They will first say “where’s the recycling?” If you say “we don’t recycle,” prepare for some awkwardness. They will make a move to throw the bottle away, they will hesitate, and then ultimately throw the bottle away. But after they return look in their eyes. All they can see is the bottle lasting forever in a landfill, trapping small animals. It will eat at them for days, at this point you should say “I’m just kidding, the recycling is under the sink. Can you fish out that bottle?” And they will do it 100% of the time!
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Tags: , , , , Monte Asbury

Written by Monte

February 20, 2008 at 5:55 pm

Posted in Race, Social change, humor

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2 Responses

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  1. :)) funny!
    I was visiting a friend in Bryan Texas, and i realized all the wine bottles ended up in trash. The city had no recycling program; they told me!

    screenblog

    February 21, 2008 at 9:58 pm

    Reply

  2. Hi Monte, you are tagged! – only if you feel like.
    What are, in your opinion, the six things one should do before turning 18?
    Rules of the game

    homeyra

    February 21, 2008 at 5:47 am

    Reply

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